Poems About Loss Of Loved One

Writing a eulogy for a friend or family member needs to be done right, I’ve decided to give you an overview of what you need to do so that it all goes well.

If you don’t know how to write a eulogy (not many people do) please make sure that you follow these points.

Firstly you need to focus: Don’t start by thinking of where you will be giving the eulogy or how many people will be there, this will only make you nervous before you even put pen to paper.

Be Alone: You can’t begin writing a eulogy with the TV/Radio playing or lots of people talking, you need silence. You need to go somewhere that you won’t be disturbed, turn out the light for 10 minutes and sit quietly. Once you’ve done this, start to think about the life of the person you are writing the eulogy about.

Start Writing: No plan at this point, just write down everything which comes into your mind. Keep doing this for some time, write down stories and memories, If you’re writing a eulogy for a friend, you don’t have to worry that some of your thought may be R Rated, you can edit these later, for now just keep writing.

Music and Pictures: Music plays a big part in my life so I remember certain occasions through the music I was listening to at the time. Have a look through some of your old track and see if this brings any flashes of inspiration, it often helps.

Put it together: Now that you’ve got all of your ideas on paper, turn them into a eulogy. Don’t worry this isn’t finished yet, once you have a draft copy of the eulogy, leave it alone for a few hours and don’t even think about it.

Edit and Polish: Now that you’ve had some time to forget about the eulogy you need to go back and read it, you will see things which need changing and rearranging. Get exact, now that you have your draft you can put more precise details in there too.

Get someone to listen: This is really important, before you read a eulogy for a friend or family member you need to try it out. I don’t mean that you have to stand in a room full of people and ask their opinions, you do however need to get an objective opinion and get proper feedback (don’t settle for someone saying “yeah that’s fine).

REMEMBER

You need to make sure that when you are writing a eulogy that you have got exact details - you will offend a lot of people if you get things wrong so Do Your Homework Properly.

Many people don’t know what a eulogy is, so here is a the explanation of a eulogy:

A eulogy is somewhat like a personalized speech. It is given at a funeral as a testimonial to the life of the deceased. It is usually given by a relative or a close personal friend of the person who passed away. The eulogy is a way to share details and fond memories of a loved one that other people may not be aware of, or that they may find comforting. Giving a eulogy can be very difficult, since emotions are high when a loved one passes on.

It is perfectly acceptable to write the eulogy yourself and ask someone else to read it for you. This is a good idea if you were especially close to the deceased and do not feel you will be able to speak. On the other hand, people expect raw emotion at such a difficult time, and will certainly understand. This being the case, if you feel it is important that you give the eulogy personally, do not be embarrassed about showing emotion while delivering your speech.

It is a good idea to prepare the eulogy ahead of time, and to write down what you want to say. You may need to walk away from it for awhile, and look it over again later. It is often difficult to express yourself under such strain. If overcome with emotion, give yourself some time before attempting to finish writing the eulogy.

Once you are able to collect your thoughts on paper, you may wish to rehearse the eulogy a few times. Reading aloud will help you catch errors and notice awkward lines, giving you the opportunity to rephrase. Practicing the eulogy might also trigger another memory that you would like to add.

Bringing note cards with you to the funeral is also a good idea. It is easy to forget what you want to say when you are standing before a group of people, caught up in the sentiments of the moment. Bring tissue with you to the podium as well. The most important thing to remember is that the eulogy is your way of honoring your loved one, and what you say is far more important that how you say it.

A eulogy can also take the form of poems. Eulogy poems are personalized poems about the deceased, as I said in previous posts, you can find a poem and personalize it to the person you have lost, by doing this you create eulogy poems.

In loving memory poems are kind of confusing by definition, are you telling people how you remember the person, saying goodbye or making a tribute to their life?

This is a very important choice and one that has to be made early.

There are no set rules about the kind of in loving memory poems people use, but you need to consider this:

Are you saying goodbye? If you are then how do you say it so that it doesn’t sound final? The most upsetting part of a funeral is when someone makes a statement like “and we shall never see you again” this is just awful, you need to choose something which either leaves it open “You will be with us forever” or “Until I see your smile again” these are open ended farewells which don’t close the door at the end, they seem more positive.

Also, avoid poems which end similar to “until we meet again” this is a time of immense sorrow and the last thing the people in the funeral party need right now is to (A) think about their own mortality (they’re already doing that) and (B) it makes you sound as though you are in a rush to join your departed one, this makes them worry about leaving you on your own.

A celebration of life is always a good idea, create a eulogy about the persons life, share these memories with the people at the funeral service. Once you have shared your feelings go on to a nice poem of life rather than death.

Choosing a poems, especially “poems about loss of loved one” can be very difficult, there are so many things that we want to say, but do you make it personal or generalize it so that everyone knows what you mean?

This is a really tough choice:

When my father in law died this year, my brother in law wanted to say a poem but decided on a eulogy instead, the eulogy was very touching and moved the whole family which was pretty unusual as he’s normally a real pain.

Unfortunately the eulogy was pretty personal, things that he’d done over the years and how he had looked after and supported my brother in law and wife. This made it a little hard for people to visualize him as this person because a lot of them hadn’t met him back then.

But! Even though a number of people couldn’t relate to my brother in laws words “we call them father eulogy poems now” they all felt the love that went into writing it and knew how hard it must have been for him to read it at the service.

And where was I when he was speaking? stood right next to him for moral support. All I had to say was “Don’t rush, take a few deep breaths before you start and read slowly” that was it, he was an absolute star and he would have made his father very proud.

What makes a good poem or eulogy for a father?

You have to remember that a father is usually your role model, we all look up to our fathers for guidance and support throughout our lives. Where do you think the saying “like father like son” originated? It’s because we do tend to imitate our dad’s, this is why a eulogy or poem for the loss of a father can be so gut wrenching, it’s like our idol has died, and in all fairness - he has.

So make it special, pull out all the stops and let the whole world know what the man you idolized was like, just because he’s gone doesn’t mean that you are less proud of him.

A eulogy for a father can start about you! how you saw him, your first joint project (building a tree house) and then take this story all the way up to the present day. Drop in parts about his friends, work colleagues, hobbies, grand children (if appropriate) You really can dig around and put it all in.

This is a celebration of his life, let everyone know how your father lived and what his values taught you.

(dedicated to my brother in law Paul, I never knew you had it in you!)